Connections.

I've been ambling through my various friendships recently and have realized something:

I don't have to be around someone for very long to form a deep connection of the spirit and heart.

In fact, I usually am not.
I usually have brief encounters in which I instantly fall in love with a soul, form an attachment, and then continue to adore and deepen our love from afar.

What I love is that many of these relationships continue to prosper, despite the distance, and some of my favorite people are of these. Well, all of them.
Of course, because of my natural instinct to love, I have a tendency to consider everyone my favorite person, at least for a moment.

But my top favorites?

The ones that when I think about, make me instantly smile.
The ones that when I have any contact with, bring about a childlike giddiness to my heart.
The ones that I would bend over backwards to visit.
The ones that make my voice change pitch because I am that excited to talk to.
The ones that when I met, I felt an instant connection with.
The ones that I just want to hug.

They are my closest friends, whether I speak with them on a regular basis, or at odd intervals in the passing months.
There is always that sense that they belong in my life; that they have always been there, and always will be.
They are the ones that I met once and knew would be in my life forever.
They are the ones who, though far away, are near all the time.
They are the ones always in my heart.

I don't know if they even know who they are, or the place they have in my heart. But for months now, though not recorded, my ambling has gone out to them.

There’s a miracle of friendship that dwells within the heart
And you don’t know how it happens or where it gets its start
But the happiness it brings you always gives a special lift
And you realize that friendship
is God’s most perfect gift.
.Anonymous.

The disconnect from oneself.

I haven't been updating my blog very often. I know.
There is a reason for this, though I am sad that it is so:
I have forgotten to amble.

The point of creating this blog was to remind me constantly to amble, and to give me an outlet to share my ambles with others who so wish to read them. But I found myself caught up in the same circus as everyone else, forgetting who I am, forgetting what I do: amble.

It took a roller coaster ride to set me straight again. But that "roller coaster" wasn't a bad thing. Nay, quite the contrary.
That roller coaster set me back where I needed to be, it just added to my life: experience, understanding, and most importantly, another person who understands and cares for me. A person that I let inside.
It took drastic measures to set me straight after that. I spent two days doing nothing, "being a bum" as I described myself then, but I now realize that I was ambling. I ambled through the entire relationship: from the start of the friendship to the end of what we deemed our "togetherness." During those thoughts I spoke to people very dear to me, and let them speak of what they wanted, and I learned. I spoke to that whom I recently let in, and I learned. I then sat around and thought, doing nothing in particular but being wrapped in a warm blanket, and I contemplated. I contemplated all of my thoughts and actions, all of my conversations, and all that I tell myself I am or need to be.

My ambling gave me perspective.
The perspective to see myself clearly again, without this shroud of emotions clouding my vision. I am grateful for everything that happened, because not only did I learn, but I remembered what I need to be doing:
Ambling.

The power of Thy name.

"Armed with the power of They name, nothing can ever hurt me, and all the world's afflictions can in no wise alarm me."
- Baha'u'llah

A mantra to repeat when the world is falling apart around you.
A prayer to sing when the cut is deep.
A cry of humbling love to fill you with strength.

A phrase which helped me through so much. And is needed to help again.

At least I have the perspective to realize, see, and understand that there is much worse hurt than a little heartbreak. And that with every heartbreak, there is a new beginning. A new beginning that builds on the last one, that accepts what was good and bad and moves forward, wiser.

Even with all that perspective, it still hurts. It won't stop the stomach ache, the feeling that your chest is being torn apart. It won't keep the tears from falling, keep the pain at bay, or the desire to sleep the rest of your life away.

And so, when I am trapped in that painful downward spiral of heartbreak, all I can do is pray:
"Armed with the power of Thy name, nothing can ever hurt me, and all the world's afflictions can in no wise alarm me."

Thank you Devon Gundry, for putting my favorite, most used quote into a song for me to sing.

Hugs.

A warm, enveloping embrace.

A simple gesture that can make your day.

A means of sharing joy.

A way to show your love.

A mutual acceptance of each other's meaning in your lives.

A a soundless greeting that says more than words ever could.

A hug.
Enough said.

Panoramic Life

Adib wants this amazing panoramic camera, the fuji g617, and he made me look at these pictures. Some of which took my breath away, and made me want to amble:


Allow your mind to wander over this picture and observe all of the different nuances of the lights. It is truly spectacular.


This picture reminded me of my time in El Salvador to a degree, when I went hiking in the mountains and swimming in the collected pools of water filled with joy and poisonous water snakes.

The birds, the calm sea, the soft sunset in the background... all are the aspects of a true amble.

I would love to lie here and amble through my thoughts. The vibrant colors stimulate my mind in a most soothing way.

This one is my favorite. I would love to amble along that trail, meandering through the forest's fall:
Thank you Adib, for showing me these amazing pictures. Or rather, making me look at them.
But I cannot leave off credit where it is due, to the wonderful photographers who took these
photographs.

Things that can change your day.

I ambled about my heart today and found a sort of sadness which I could not place. It put me in a funk.
And then Awa, my roommate from Ethiopia, started talking to me, and in my sudden joy at her presence in my life, I realized that I had missed her.

It's funny that one person can change the course of your entire day. It can be the most awful day you have ever experienced, but in a quick exchange with someone you care for, it can take a drastic turn for the better, and vice versa.

A shared smile, a wink, a kind word from a stranger.
A hug from a friend.

Adib

is crazy.
Period.

Happy now?